


JMC's favourite

by rear_admiral_rimmer



Category: Red Dwarf (UK TV)
Genre: Anal Sex, Explicit Sexual Content, M/M, Multi, Oral Sex, Plot What Plot/Porn Without Plot, Prostitution, Threesome - M/M/M, a little plot maybe
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-06
Updated: 2020-12-06
Packaged: 2021-03-10 06:09:04
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,054
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27919513
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rear_admiral_rimmer/pseuds/rear_admiral_rimmer
Summary: Rimmer is back one last time to see his favourite Mimas prostitute. But this time, he's in for a surprise...Written for the Red Dwarf Remix Fest 2020 - remix of SugarCrystal's "Never Enough" :)
Relationships: Dave Lister/Arnold Rimmer, Dave Lister/Arnold Rimmer/Frank Todhunter
Comments: 16
Kudos: 20
Collections: Red Dwarf Fic Remix Fest 2020





	JMC's favourite

**Author's Note:**

  * For [SugarCrystal](https://archiveofourown.org/users/SugarCrystal/gifts).



So, Rimmer was back after all. 

This was the last time. It didn’t matter if the filthy Scouser accuses him of being needy or hypocritical – it would be the last time he saw him. And then, Red Dwarf leaves the orbit again and it would be up up up the ziggurat and never looking back. And if he ever came back (which he won’t!) he would be back as a real officer. 

He didn’t even consider the option of his rent boy not waiting at his usual spot. He was already coming up with a response to his usual nags, only to realise Lister was nowhere to be found. Panicking, he walked further, trying to avoid the looks of the dubious looking characters. The idea of someone else having their way with Lister made his blood boil. 

And then he saw him, right before he disappeared with another tall man in a backdoor leading back into the club. Rimmer didn't see much, but the dreadlocks falling over the leather jacket, as well as the silhouette of the shapely arse in tight trousers were unmistakable. He only caught a shadow of the other man. 

The sensible thing would be to give it up and head back to Red Dwarf. Rimmer didn’t feel like paying someone else, to be honest, he didn’t even feel like fucking all that much today. Well, he did, but not with anyone else but Lister. The boy infected his mind ever since their first time. Rimmer had never been a very sexual person. He had needs, sure, resolved by a few vague fantasies he would entertain in his alone time. But since meeting Lister, he could barely hold it together whenever he recalled their short encounters, and he would obsessively masturbate to them weeks later. 

Damn, he was really looking forward to this last time. And who did that guy think he was? Well, Rimmer wasn’t the most sensible man. In the fit of jealousy and craving, Rimmer stormed after the pair. He entered through the metal door and followed the staircase to the likely unauthorised areas of the establishment. He just caught the glimpse of the two disappearing around the corner and he sped up his walk, nearly running. Lister and his client rushed through the empty underground corridors. If they said anything, it was entirely muted by the thumping and blasting of the music above their heads. 

Rimmer followed them to their destination and hid in a dark corner as the two came to a door in slightly more illuminated hall. This might not be a part of the club anymore, Rimmer suspected it was part of the brothel next-door. Lister’s client opened the door for him and then looked around for the last time to make sure they weren't followed. The light hit his face and not even the cap on his head helped him in that moment. Rimmer gasped. It was Todhunter. 

If Rimmer was annoyed before, he was extremely furious now. Disbelief, jealousy, amusement and anger mixed in him as he stood frozen on the spot. And then it hit him, irrational jealousy aside, he could use this to his advantage! He could blackmail Todhunter. 

He should have left. Left, implied his knowledge to Todhunter later and enjoy the smooth sail to up the ranks. Yeah, but at the same time, Todhunter might currently be the last JMC officer to enjoy the smooth sail up Lister’s ass. Rimmer’s face was burning. It was supposed to be _him._

And since when was Todhunter gay? Wasn’t he married? Rimmer thought and thought and then didn’t - he had to know. He walked over to the door and peeked through the keyhole. His eyes widened. He would expect Todhunter to perhaps come here for a lousy blowjob. Nothing less, nothing more. But currently, Lister was on his lap and they seemed to be making out. 

Impulsively, Rimmer stormed in. Clearly, there was no key, perhaps for safety reason, smeg knows. He regretted it the second he did it, but it was too late to pretend it wasn’t him. Both Lister and Todhunter immediately identified him. 

“Oh, for fuck’s sake, this is embarrassing,” Lister smirked, not even bothering to leave the officer’s lap. “I’m sorry baby, found meself a real officer.” 

“Get off,” Todhunter commanded quietly and rushed Lister off his lap, trying to remain calm but he was clearly flustered. Surprisingly, Lister obeyed, which infuriated Rimmer even more. And _hurt._ Real officer?! He took a breath, time to act now, cry himself to sleep later. 

“I don’t believe it, you absolute skank! All your cute stories about me being the only one you kiss, very nice.” Rimmer frowned. Then he bit his lip, realising he just outed himself to Todhunter as Lister’s client. Well, it probably wouldn’t take a genius to figure out. 

The officer cleared his throat. “Well, this is awkward, indeed.” 

Todhunter wasn't stupid, by any means. He understood what kind of person Rimmer was and the advantage he just got. While it _probably_ wasn’t exactly against Space Corps regulations to hook up with a prostitute at a shore leave, spreading this aboard Red Dwarf would do outrageous damage to his reputation. Snitching to Todhunter’s family was another story. A live-devastating story. 

"Alright, Rimmer, what do you want to keep this quiet?" Todhunter said diplomatically, buttoning up his shirt. Rimmer thought about this momentarily, looking at them both. 

"So, you're his boss? Smeg, this is hilarious." 

"Be quiet, Lister," said Todhunter and Rimmer felt a pang in his chest at hearing his name for the first time. Now he felt like Todhunter had more rights to Lister because he knew his name. Rimmer didn't even want to know. Why did Todhunter have everything? He wanted to ruin him. Lister was the only thing that was _his._ And other randos’ in Mimas, but when it came to others in Space Corps, he thought he was special. Lister was choosing to kiss _him._ How could Rimmer be so damn stupid and think it meant anything? How did the classic song from the 2000s go? _Don’t trust a hoe._

"Well, you can start by leaving Lister alone and getting the smeg out of here," Rimmer lifted his head authoritatively. Shamefully, he felt a stirring in his groin at the prospect of commanding Todhunter. 

"Yo, I think I have a say in this too, hm?" Lister purred back at the bed, leaning on his arms with his shirt still unbuttoned. 

"Threatening won't end well for you, Rimmer." 

Rimmer came closer to the man. Damn, he was _tall._ He was even taller than Rimmer. Lister must be tiny next to him, and Rimmer felt an irrational surge of protectiveness. 

"I have nothing to lose. You've got _everything_ to lose," he said in a low growl, inch away from his superior's face. 

"Alright lads, while I'm incredibly flattered to be fought over by you, I actually need to make dough. I'm fine watching ya hate fuck each other but I want to be reimbursed anyway," Lister said, pulling out a cigarette and lighting it up. 

"You wouldn't do that," Todhunter hissed, ignoring Lister as he tried to call Rimmer's bluff. 

"You don't know how desperate I am." 

"Yeah, he's really desperate to be an officer, Todhunter." Lister commented, tasting the new name he just found out today on his tongue. Todhunter clenched his teeth. 

"So, how about you take a seat instead, Frank?" Rimmer changed his plans, feeling himself getting harder yet when seeing the hidden terror in his eyes. 

"Make him your bitch, Rimsy." Lister bit his lip and let his hand playfully hover over his own fly. 

"Take your clothes off," Rimmer said. Todhunter gave him a look. 

"Don't make me laugh," Todhunter gave him a small smile. Rimmer came closer and leaned his arms on the armrests beside his superior. 

"I will be laughing when your family falls apart, your wife takes the kids, and they kick you out of Space Corps and I'll sip brandy with Captain Hollister in your place while you have no choice than to sell your lanky body right next to _him_." 

Todhunter's eyes widened. Not because he actually believed Rimmer could destroy his life to that extent but because he didn't think Rimmer had it in him to try to intimidate him like that. 

"Alright. Have it your way,” Todhunter said and started unbuttoning his shirt while keeping the eye contact. Rimmer had never thought about Todhunter this way but seeing him get undressed on his command made him slightly giddy. 

Rimmer turned to Lister then, whose hand was now down his unzipped trousers, feeling himself. That made his own cock twitch. 

“Now, I didn’t allow you to do that, did I, you dirty thing?” 

“What’re you gonna do about it?” Lister challenged, his face serious and involved for once. Rimmer stood above him, his crotch perfectly aligned with Lister’s face. 

“How about you use that smart mouth for something more practical?” he replied, cupping Lister’s pretty face with one hand, gently pushing him closer. Lister’s mouth curled into a smirk as he took the hint and unbuckled Rimmer’s belt. Quickly undoing his trousers, he pulled his nearly fully hard cock out and slowly wrapped his lips around it, running his tongue over the tip. Rimmer gasped quietly, caressed Lister’s face and took a hold of the side of his neck. It didn’t help that Todhunter was watching. It made him self-conscious but also that much more aroused. He never realised he could enjoy a little audience. 

“So, we’re really doing this,” Todhunter said. Rimmer closed his eyes and bent his head to enjoy the sensation of Lister’s warm mouth working his cock when he felt an arm snake around his waist. He lifted his head and just when he turned to Todhunter, lips fell upon his own in a sensual kiss. He let out a muted groan of protest, but he couldn’t bring himself to actually push him away. It wasn’t exactly easy to push an attractive man of authority away when your senses are overwhelmed by an impending orgasm. 

Todhunter was also an excellent kisser. Smeg it all - Rimmer kissed him back. He realised a few seconds later the warm mouth on his cock was replaced by a hand and Todhunter gasped into his mouth while clutching the fabric of his shirt. Lister’s bratty mouth was now working Todhunter instead. Rimmer wished he wasn’t so enthralled by the sight. 

“I want a promotion,” Rimmer muttered against Todhunter’s mouth, and gasped as the movements of Lister’s fingers sent waves of pleasure through him. “Offierhood,” he added. 

“Second technician,” Todhunter negotiated, meeting Rimmer for another kiss. 

“First technician,” Rimmer growled. 

“Second technician and a good word to Hollister.” 

Lister’s lips shifted back to Rimmer who moaned in response. He dropped his cigarette disinterestedly on the carpet and smudged it with his boot. 

“Deal...for now. Oh, oh- smeg,” he grabbed Lister's dreadlocks, keeping him in place as he was nearing his orgasm. 

“Lister, get on all four for us, will you?” Todhunter instructed and Lister removed himself from Rimmer’s grasp right before he would come and Rimmer groaned in frustration. 

“Gladly, sir,” he purred, taking his trousers swiftly off and doing as he was told. 

“And give me some lube,” Todhunter asked patiently. Lister handed him a small bottle from his pocket, and Todhunter squeezed a generous amount on his fingers. Lister locked eyes with Rimmer when Todhunter started working his entrance with the tip of his fingers and Rimmer stared at the scene breathlessly. Lister reached for his shirt and pulled him down to the bed. 

“Come’ere,” he said huskily and kissed Rimmer meanwhile. Rimmer melted against his lips, finally getting to taste him again. He’d been looking forward to it since the minute they parted last time. Powered by the never yet achieved orgasm, he hungrily kissed him with tongue. 

Lister moaned into the kiss. Whether he did it for the show, nobody knew. But Todhunter was working his long, slim fingers inside Lister with patient precision and then Lister was sucking at Rimmer’s throat and it was too late to stop this. 

Todhunter removed his fingers, satisfied with his handiwork, and gave his own cock a few strokes. Rimmer noticed. 

“ _I_ will have him,” he said determinedly, meeting his gaze. 

“I thought you’d say that,” said Todhunter. 

“He probably couldn’t stop thinking about being inside me for a minute since the last time. Did ya, Rimmer?” Lister muttered into Rimmer’s ear, nibbling on it. Shivers ran through Rimmer. 

“Absolutely not,” he said weakly with his eyes closed. He didn’t realise he said the opposite of what he wanted to say. 

“How about you turn around and let Rimmer fuck that pretty arse of yours, then?” Todhunter said. 

“With pleasure,” said Lister. He gave Rimmer one more wet kiss and turned to the officer. 

Todhunter run a hand over Lister's hair in a somewhat gentle but still powerful manner. Lister smiled up at him and as he leaned down to kiss Lister fiercely, Rimmer grabbed Lister's hips firmly and snatched him away. 

"And don't kiss him or your secret's out," Rimmer commanded. 

"You really have a fixation on him, don't you, Rimmer?" 

"He really does," Lister smirked. 

"I told you, you're just convenient!" Rimmer protested and aligned his erection with Lister's opening after slipping a condom on. 

"Convenient?" Lister laughed, playfully stroking Todhunter's cock. "As in following us all the way here and getting into an argument over me convenient, is that so, third technician Rimmer-ow!" Rimmer pushed the head of his cock inside him to shut him up, and also because he would break down if he didn't get inside Lister in the next goddamn second. 

"That's second technician, squire," he just about managed, holding Lister's hips as he worked himself deeper in. 

"C'mon baby, I need your mouth on me," said Todhunter, tired of their bickering. He prompted Lister by a gentle push at the back of his head. 

"Well, since you're asking so nicely," Lister licked his lips and swallowed him deeply. Rimmer fitted nearly his whole length inside him and started with light thrusts. Lister hummed around Todhunter’s cock in response, making him groan at the vibrations it caused. 

"God, yes." 

"Smeg, you feel so good," Rimmer muttered, digging his short, well-manicured nails into Lister's rounded hips. Lister moaned again and Todhunter's hips bucked against Lister. He was so close himself. 

Somewhat on accident, Rimmer's and Todhunter's eyes locked. It was really something different from when they meet on the ship and for a little moment, there was no authority and rank smeg between then - just a sexy Scouser with an attitude, taking it from both sides like his life depended on it. 

It got a bit too much to see Todhunter smirk at him and then lose the smirk to a gasp of pleasure that Lister caused with his swift tongue. He would never have thought he would come at the sight of his superior. His body twitched as he spilled all he had while inside Lister, groaning without inhibition. 

“Oh shit,” said Todhunter as he, too, came at the sight of Rimmer losing it. 

“Ugh, you two make me feel like a proper whore,” said Lister breathlessly, come dripping down his chin and all over his palm which he spat some of it in. He wiped himself in the blanket. 

Todhunter and Rimmer looked at each other, dishevelled, dirty, perhaps regretting all their life choices in the post-orgasm clarity. 

“I can’t believe you two never shagged up on your ship,” Lister said weakly, reaching for another cigarette. “Both satisfied?” he added. They both looked at him with such intensity it was almost unnerving. Before Lister knew it, he was dropping his cigarette, Rimmer was kissing him and Todhunter’s hand was on his painfully hard cock. He moaned into Rimmer’s mouth and he never realised just how much he loved men until now. 

Uncharacteristically, Lister reached behind Rimmer’s neck and pulled him closer to kiss him passionately. Todhunter’s mouth was at his neck then and he was panting. Nobody ever bothered to get him off or kiss him after they were finished. 

“Ohh, smeg, I’m close,” cried Lister and Rimmer took a moment to watch him lose control, completely mesmerized. 

“Smeg off, Todhunter,” Rimmer decided impulsively, shoving his superior’s hand away as he dove down and took Lister’s sizable, twitching erection in his mouth. All dignity be damned, he’d always wanted to do it. Lister gasped and Todhunter stole a secret kiss from Lister when Rimmer was occupied. Rimmer’s mouth enclosed around Lister’s cock tightly and deeply, which was enough to make him come. Lister was nearly thrashing on the bed. He took a fistful of Rimmer’s hair harshly and pulled his head in as he rode his orgasm. Rimmer gagged, spitting the contents out. 

They all fell down on the bed next to each other, exhausted, with Lister in the middle. None of them spoke for a short while. Rimmer didn’t want to confront the reality. Somehow, in the sweaty tangle of male bodies in a shady room and under the thumping of the club music, he felt more comfortable than ever before. Like he pushed all the boundaries he could push and there was nothing but ecstasy left. Complete freedom. 

“Can we take him with us?” he said then, irrationally, playing with one of Lister’s dreadlocks. 

Todhunter chuckled. “Back to Red Dwarf? Yeah, that would be a proper shit show.” 

Lister shifted between them to untangle himself and got up from the bed. He put his trousers on and effortlessly started buttoning his shirt. 

“So, I wasn’t sure how to tell ya,” he said, finding his cigarette on the floor. He rested it on his ear and faced his two clients. “But I applied to JMC a few days back and I got a post on Red Dwarf.” 

They stared at him, life draining from their faces. Lister scratched the back of his head awkwardly. 

“I’m done with this smeg. So, I’ll see you boys up onboard, eh?” he lighted up his long-awaited cigarette. “And actually, don’t worry ‘bout the money. I had fun. Buy me a few drinks at the Dwarf.” He winked and left. 


End file.
